Colorado Silly Laws

Dumb Colorado Laws

By state:

One may not mutilate a rock in a state park.
It's government property you know
No liquor may be sold on Sundays or election days. Repealed 2008: Colorado residents can now buy alcohol on Sundays
Voting and alcohol don't mix
It is illegal to ride a horse while under the influence.
Good plan
Tags may be ripped off of pillows and mattresses.
I'm moving to Colorado!
Car dealers may not show cars on a Sunday.
You gotta go to Utah for that

City Laws in Colorado

Alamosa

Persons may not urinate in public.
Good idea
Throwing missles at cars is illegal.
Also a good idea
Keeping a house where unmarried persons are allowed to have sex is prohibited.
But can they live together?

Arvada

Establishments which sell alcohol must have enough lighting to read text inside them.
Cause who wants to buy booze in the dark

Aspen

Catapults may not be fired at buildings.
But it has always been my dream to storm the castle.

Boulder

Boulders may not be rolled on city property.
Those are seriously unimaginative pranksters.
Couches may not be placed on outside porches.
Not even wicker?? 
It is legal to challenge a police officer, but only until he or she asks you to stop.
On the next episode of Polite Criminals....
It is illegal to permit ones llama to graze on city property.
Cause they spit.

Colorado Springs

It is permissable to wear a holstered six-gun within city limits, except on Sunday, Election Day, or holidays.
John Wayne rules

Cripple Creek

It is illegal to bring your horse or pack mule above the ground floor of any building.
I'm sorry sir we don't have any rooms available on the ground floor

Denver

You may not drive a black car on Sundays.
So I have to buy two cars now??
It is illegal to mistreat rats in Denver, Colorado.
Rats should all die a vicious death. I will not be going to Denver.

The dog catcher must notify dogs of impounding by posting, for three consecutive days, a notice on a tree in the city park and along a public road running through said park.

Hang it where the dogs hang out that way they will be sure to read it,

It is unlawful to lend your vacuum cleaner to your next-door neighbor.

What about to my upstairs neighbor?

Durango

It is illegal to go in public dressed in clothes “unbecoming” on one’s sex.

So....no ugly people???

Fountain

It is illegal to have a broken down car on private property or public right-of-ways

Where exactly am I supposed to put my broken down car then?

It is illegal to have weeds in your yard

The Beautification Society has spoken!

Logan County

It is illegal for a man to kiss a woman while she is asleep.

Haven't you ever seen a romantic movie???

Louisville

Residents may not own chickens, but may own up to two turkeys.

Oh yeah that makes sense

Pueblo

It is illegal to let a dandelion grow within the city limits.

But those dandelions never listen

Sterling

Cats may not run loose without having been fit with a taillight.

Say what???

Vail

It is illegal to crash into obstacles on a ski slope.

Also it is not wise

No one may keep junk close to someone else.

Define junk

Westminster

Do not allow somebody to park less than 2 feet from you, or you will have to pay a fine.

So now I'm responsible for what complete strangers do?

Don’t get lost between 9pm-4am, or allow somebody else to get lost while ‘operating’ your car because it is against the law

Cause we're sleeping and are not coming to look for you

Do not send a work crew in more than 1 vehicle in any residential district of the city because it is against the law

The city will now be providing clown cars for work crews

Laws found at: http://www.dumblaws.com/laws/united-states/colorado?page=0