California: silly laws

California's Silly Laws

By state:

California prison workers will no longer be allowed to have sex with inmates
Was it legal at some point?
Film producers must have permission from a pediatrician before filming a child under the age of one month
Only in California...
It’s unlawful to let a dog pursue a bear or bobcat at any time.
How big are the dogs there?
In San Jose and Sunnyvale it is illegal for grocery stores to provide plastic bags.
What if you bring your own?
You may only throw a frisbee at the beach in Los Angeles County, CA with the lifeguard’s permission.
Isn't that kind of how all beach rules work?
No vehicle without a driver may exceed 60 miles per hour.
Seems legit
Animals are banned from mating publicly within 1,500 feet of a tavern, school, or place of worship.
Did anyone tell the animals?
Bathhouses are against the law.
And are gross
Sunshine is guaranteed to the masses.
No one said anything about smog
It is a misdemeanor to shoot at any kind of game from a moving vehicle, unless the target is a whale.
What do they have against whales?
Women may not drive in a house coat.
However, men are encouraged

City Laws in California

Alhambra

You cannot leave your car on the street overnight without the proper permit.
Where are you supposed to leave it?

Arcadia

Peacocks have the right of way to cross any street, including driveways.
Cause pretty always goes first

Baldwin Park

Nobody is allowed to ride a bicycle in a swimming pool.
How else are they supposed to practice extreme sports?

Belvedere

City Council order reads: “No dog shall be in a public place without its master on a leash.
Giggles

Blythe

You are not permitted to wear cowboy boots unless you already own at least two cows.
So....horse rancher can't wear cowboy boots?

Burlingame

It is illegal to spit, except on baseball diamonds.
Well spitting is gross even on baseball diamonds.

Carmel

A man can’t go outside while wearing a jacket and pants that do not match.
Wives unite!
Ice cream may not be eaten while standing on the sidewalk. (Repealed when Clint Eastwood was mayor)
Clint Eastwood doesn't stand for nonsense.
Women may not wear high heels while in the city limits.
You have to carry them I guess.

Cathedral City

One may not bring their dog to school.

Can Mary bring her lamb?

It is prohibited to sleep in a parked vehicle.

What about RVs?

Persons may not ride their bicycles through the “Fountain of Life”.

Adults can though. 

Cerritos

All dog “waste” must be removed from any yard within seven days.

.....

Chico

Bowling on the sidewalk is illegal.

Spoiling all the fun

Driving a herd of cattle down a street is against the law.

This ain't the wild west people..

It is illegal to plant a garden in any public street.

Is this really a problem?

Detonating a nuclear device within the city limits results in a $500 fine.

They may want to increase that. Inflation and what not

One must obtain a permit from the city to throw hay in a cesspool.

Sure why not

It is illegal to own a green or smelly animal hide.

Ewwww...

Dana Point

One may not use one’s own restroom if the window is open.

I....what?

Downey

It is illegal to wash your car in the street.

Do that sort of thing elsewhere

El Monte

Waitresses are not allowed to consume drinks bought by her customers.

What are they supposed to do with them?

Sandboxes may not be used as ashtrays.

Good idea

Pinball machines are outlawed, as well as mock horse racing games.

Trouble right here in River City...that starts with T and that rhymes with P and that stands for pool!

Eureka

Persons may not sleep on a road.

Good looking out 

One must seek written permission from the Director of Public Works before playing baseball in a city park.

Tyrant

Men who wear moustaches are forbidden from kissing women.

That would be one way to keep from getting cooties

Fresno

No one may annoy a lizard in a city park.

Lizards go to parks to relax and have fun like everyone else

Skipping rocks in a city park is not allowed.

Parks in Fresno are boring

It is against the law to hold a private bingo game.

hmmmmm....

Permanent markers may not be sold in the city limits.

Keeps down the graffiti

It is illegal to sell gasoline to a drunken person.

Gasoline purchasing requires a clear head.

Elementary schools may not host poker tournaments.

Poker is not good for moral fiber.

Getting drunk on a playground is against the law.

We're very concerned about that moral fiber.

Glendale

A person must be 18 years old to buy a wax container.

Wax containers are dangerous stuff

It is illegal to jump into a passing car.

What about if you're filming a movie?

One may not take his dog on an elevator with him.

But, my dogs don't like stairs

Cars may not be driven in reverse.

EVER???

Hermosa Beach

It is illegal to pour salt on a highway.

It kills the Slug Bugs

Public restrooms must be supplied with toilet paper.

Fully legit law

No person may show his or her buttocks on a playground.

Good rule

Hollywood

It is illegal to drive more than two thousand sheep down Hollywood Boulevard at one time.

That is a lot of sheep

Indian Wells

Fortelling the future for donations is illegal.

What if you do it for profit?

Crushing rocks in the city limits is forbidden.

We can't have any of that kind of behavior

It is illegal for a trumpet player to play his instrument with the intention of luring someone to a store.

The Pied Trumpeter

Drinking intoxicating cement is prohibited.

What is intoxicating cement???

Lafayette

You are forbidden to spit on the ground within 5 feet of another person.

Keep your tape measurer handy

Lodi

It is illegal to shoot “silly string” at parade participants.

That stuff can be daqngerous you know

Lompoc

It is illegal to posses, own or raise roosters.

Death to roosters!

Long Beach

Cars are the only item allowed in a garage.

Cleanest garages in three counties

It is illegal to curse on a mini-golf course.

I'm out

Los Angeles

You may not hunt moths under a street light.

It just ain't sporting

It is illegal to cry on the witness stand.

Being a witness is serious business

Toads may not be licked.

Yeah, good idea

It is a crime for dogs to mate within 500 yards of a church.

Who decided that?

Zoot suits are prohibited.

Crimes against fashion

It is illegal for a man to beat his wife with a strap wider than 2 inches without her consent.

Honey, is it ok if I beat you today?

You cannot bathe two babies in the same tub at the same time.

They might see each other naked.

Los Angeles County

No person may charge admission to a house party.

I saw that movie. Seems like a good idea.

It is illegal to skateboard and roller-skate through the courthouse and library.

And rude

All food in a children's camp must be approved by the director before being used.

That actually seems like a good idea.

It is illegal to set metal balloons afloat in the air.

Yeah...it is against the law of physics

Norco

All persons wishing to keep a rhinoceros as a pet must obtain a $100 license first.

Do you know how much it costs to feed a rhino??? I don't have $100

Growing oleander flowers is illegal.

Probably because they are poisonous

Vehicles may not contain sound systems which allow someone to hear noise outside the vehicle.

Good I don't want to hear your crappy music.

It is unlawful to give another fireworks.

These are mine. Go buy your own.

Ontario

Roosters may not crow in the city limits.

Somebody get that rooster a muzzle

Pacific Grove

It is illegal to molest butterflies.

Why would you want to?

Palm Springs

It is illegal to walk a camel down Palm Canyon Drive between the hours of four and six PM.

Rich people problems

Pasadena

It is illegal for a secretary to be alone in a room with her boss.

Bosses are never to be trusted

Portola

No person may carry a fish into a bar.

It starts too many bad jokes. We just can't take it.

One may not allow his or her dog to chase a squirrel in the summer.

Tell the squirrells to stay away from my dog

It is illegal to fish from an overpass in the city.

What are you trying to catch?

Prunedale

Two bathtubs may not be installed in the same house.

Sometimes there are just no words

Redlands

Motor vehicles may not drive on city streets unless a man with a lantern is walking ahead of it.

This is especially important in the daytime

Redwood City

It is illegal to have a monkey or a reptile.

No one in my family will be moving there

Riverside

One may not carry a lunch down the street between 11 and 1 o’clock.

That's when you're supposed to eat it not carry it

San Diego

It is illegal to shoot jackrabbits from the back of a streetcar.

You gotta chase them down on foot

The owners of houses with Christmas lights on them past February second may be fined up to $250.

What about trailers?

San Francisco

Persons classified as “ugly” may not walk down any street.

Way to be accepting San Fran

It is illegal to pile horse manure more than six feet high on a street corner.

Seems like a good plan

Giving or receiving oral sex is prohibited.

In San Francisco????

Prohibits elephants from strolling down Market Street unless they are on a leash.

We don't want them strolling all willy nilly

It is illegal to wipe one’s car with used underwear.

Can you wipe someone else's car?

San Jose

It is illegal to have more than two cats or dogs.

But I can have 500 hamsters!

San Luis Obispo

Using a gas-powered blower at a business on Sunday is prohibited.

You gotta buy an electric one

Santa Monica

You may not play percussion instruments on the beach.

Sorry Matthew McConaughey

Shasta Lake

One may not raffle off a dog as a gift in any public place.

Do that in the privacy of your home

Simi Valley

Remote control cars can only be driven in designated areas of city parks.

Not in my kitchen!

Temecula

Ducks have the right of way to cross Rancho California St.

And they abuse it too

Thousand Oaks

Before a business may have a “going out of business sale”, they must obtain a special permit from the city manager.

Gotta make sure you're really going out of business I saw that Zohan movie

Walnut

Children may not wear a halloween mask unless they get a special permit from the sheriff.

Gee what a fun town....

Males may not dress as a female unless a special permit is obtained from the sheriff.

I hope the sheriff isn't against dressing up.

One may not leave sand in their own driveway.

It's such an eyesore

Kites may not be flown above 10 feet over the ground.

Walnut sounds like a real drag

Dumb laws from: http://www.dumblaws.com/laws/united-states/california?page=100